"Life vs. Meth" [July/August 2002] scared the hell out of me. I have done meth at least once a week for the last 10 years. It hurt me to hear these young men's stories. I didn't want to know how much damage I was doing to myself. There have even been times that I quit using my HIV meds and ended up in the hospital. I love (or am addicted to) the high -- and as Kevin Koffler described, I can't imagine sex without meth. I guess I have to ask myself: Who is running the show here? Me or crystal meth? Thank you for the slap in the face. You helped me open my eyes wider than I had the courage to.

-- D. Johnson, Phoenix

For me, the crystal craze started in San Francisco in the early 1980s: fast-paced, beautiful men (and women) who shot meth on dance floors and in bathhouses, highway restrooms or the backseat of someone's car.

It's been more than a decade since I used. The dreams of "the hit" get less frequent, but when it happens, I wake up and gasp that -- whew! -- it was just a dream. Now I take care of my health, and my CD4 count and viral load are good. All but one of my user friends are dead. We marvel at our luck. Kevin Koffler's article brought back all the memories. It was too real.

-- Name Withheld, Via the Internet

There is another downside to crystal: prison. More than half of the former meth addicts in this man-made hell are HIV positive. I used meth long before seroconverting in 1987. If dealing with this disease on the streets is hard, in prison it is much worse. Inadequate health care, bad foods, no access to vitamins or herbs and an uncaring, negative environment. So while you are thinking about "Tina," please think about me, too. I have to do another 12 years.

The odds are less than 50/50 that I'll survive the disease of my body combined with the disease of prison. Don't cut your life any shorter by using meth. It's still illegal -- and in Texas, they don't play. They make you pay.

-- C.M. Nowell #427154, J.M. Wynne Unit (C4-109-B), Huntsville, Texas

I am an HIV positive gay man who's frequented some of the Hollywood/Silverlake clubs Kevin Koffler wrote about. I've been through several treatment centers, but alas, I always seem to go back to using crystal for sex. I'm now in another treatment center, trying to put my life together. I am 21, and I know I won't be able to live longer than a couple of years unless I stay sober. Thank you, POZ.

-- Sean Morgan, San Bernardino, California

It took me 18 months to kick crystal -- I even moved to London in an attempt to escape it. As Kevin Koffler points out, all my insecurities and dysfunctions reappeared when I stopped using crystal.

But the good news is, through therapy and hard work, I was able to regain my hold on life, ignite my ambition for the future and even negotiate the dreaded sex-without-drugs. There is life after crystal!

-- Andrew McDonald, London